And then there is the matter of the luxury designer armchair. A masterpiece that promises to cradle you in comfort until your grandchildren are old and gray. But alas, my dear client, your tastes are too extravagant for the world of refined living. Cue the entrance of the Wayfair special – a chair with legs that are so flimsy they make a Jenga tower look like a fortress. Who needs stability when you can have a chair that wobbles with every sigh of regret?

In an unexpected turn of thriftiness, a client approached their interior designer with a bold request. With determined eyes, they sought a designer discount on Wayfair furniture already impressively priced for savvy shoppers. The designer, struggling to maintain composure, gently noted the furniture’s comedy-level affordability. Undeterred, the client, envisioning vast possibilities in a $5 saving, insisted on a groundbreaking negotiation. Suppressing laughter, the designer reluctantly agreed to this questionable choice because there was a possibility of shouldering the responsibility for the poor decision.

Now, let’s address the interior designer’s hourly fee. Yes it may be what appears to be a tad exorbitant, but you see, you didn’t hire me for my charming personality alone. No, you hired me for my expertise, my refined taste, my ability to transform the ordinary into the extraordinary. With a wealth of product knowledge up my stylish sleeve, it makes little sense to have me combing through Amazon Prime deals and Wayfair specials.

If a designer claims to possess encyclopedic product knowledge of every brand available on Wayfair, I might consider sprinting in the opposite direction. That’s not expertise; that’s a superhuman feat akin to memorizing an entire phone book. A seasoned designer knows the value of specialization and strategic curation, not attempting to be a walking, talking Wayfair catalog.

Here’s a pro tip, my dear client: take advantage of the designer’s knowledge and relationships with high-value manufacturers. High-end furnishings typically come with a comprehensive warranty process that covers abnormal wear and tear, setting them apart from the offerings commonly found on platforms like Wayfair. When you invest in quality, at least you’ll get a product that won’t fall apart faster than a house of cards. So go ahead, hire me. Let me take your money and weave it into sophisticated choices. It’s time to bid adieu to the wild goose chase for super deals.